The plan for this build is simply to be hilarious. You'll look fat and ugly and that's the whole point.
Buff the right Caestus with Rotten Pine Resin and use your collection of poison to inflict it on the target. When they get poisoned or the fight turns serious, bring out the Claymore.
Iron Flesh can be used to further your silliness and lull them into a false sense of security.
